Queen Elizabeth II and Hercule Poirot and Nero Wolfe Meet

After reading The Windsor Knot by S.J. Bennett I thought of a meeting of sleuths.

****

Hercule Poirot and Nero Wolfe are invited to meet with Queen Elizabeth at Windsor Castle. She is interested in discussing sleuthing with two of the giants of crime fiction.

Her Assistant Personal Secretary, Rozie Oshodi, ushers them to the Oak room.

Poirot loves the beauty of the rooms and Wolfe is grudgingly impressed by the grandeur of the Castle.

Asked what he will have to drink, Poirot requests a herbal tisane. The Queen recommends Chamomile. Poirot smiles in appreciation.

Wolfe hesitates when asked. He has rarely consumed tea and has no real desire for tea but does not want to offend the Queen. Noticing his hesitation she smiles and says:

“How about Remmers for you Mr. Wolfe? We have some bottles cooling. My staff could get you two and a bottle opener with my Coat of Arms upon it. We know you like to open them yourself.”

Stunned, Wolfe replies:

“Er, er, er …. that would be wonderful but let me not impose upon your hospitality.”

The Queen says:

“One makes an effort to ensure the comfort of distinguished guests.”

She orders Twinings Earl Grey tea for herself.

When all have their beverages the Queen says:

“It is time to discuss sleuthing.” 

Poirot and Wolfe slightly nod.

The Queen commences:

“I am sure we can agree that all three of us are believers in using the little grey cells, not brawn, in solving murder.”

Poirot and Wolfe emphatically nod their heads.

The Queen carries on:

“I believe style is important in establishing standards of professionalism. I am always conscious of my appearance though sometimes I weary of the endless choices of jewels”.

Poirot responds:

“I agree with your Majesty. The fine custom suits and hats and shoes I wear give confidence to all that my appearance, dapper if I may be so bold, is professional”.

Wolfe adds:

“My brown suits and yellow shirts and the orchids I raise show the world I am a serious man of taste and refinement.”

All three spend a few minutes lamenting contemporary sleuths who pride themselves on looking like ordinary folk

The Queen says:

“I consider a personal secretary, a sidekick I believe is the word in America, essential. I would be lost without Ms. Oshodi. I could not remain in the shadows of an investigation but for her. It would be unseemly if One needed to conduct interviews. Your thoughts gentlemen.”

Poirot quickly says:

“The good Captain Hastings is useful. He is eager to participate and occasionally helpful.”

Wolfe says:

“I completely agree. Were it not for Archie I would have to leave the brownstone to observe crime sites and conduct interviews. That would be most unsatisfactory.”

The Queen notes:

“Having a sidekick, I like that word, with military training such as Hastings and Oshodie who were both army captains gives them respect in society and access to officialdom.”

Wolfe states:

“I admire how  you use suggestions, innuendoes, discreet inquiries and quiet words in an ear. You have the advantage of us, Your Majesty, with hundreds of devoted staff and a nation eager to help you.”

The Queen, a touch tartly:

“I may have the advantage in human resources but I have the disadvantage, as Philip reminds me, of being perceived as a ‘little old lady in a hat’. You gentlemen will never be underestimated. You each bear the title of genius somewhat lightly.”

Poirot quickly moves on:

“Ma’am, I admire that in successfully pursuing your investigations you received no glory for solving murder. Indeed, you avoid mention. You seek no recognition. Justice is what is important to yourself.”

Wolfe blunders on:

“Ma’am, I do believe you have a great advantage because of your stature. Who refuses the Queen’s invitation to a discussion at the Castle or Palace? Archie almost has to dragoon individuals to come to meetings at the brownstone.”

The Queen graciously nods and says:

 “One does use the allure of the throne and the invitation of helping the monarch of the realm.”

The Queen carries on:

“Mr. Wolfe, how exciting it must be to have meetings of murder suspects in your office with cocktails and beer as you reveal the killer.”

Wolfe acknowledges with a slight smile and replies:

“Such meetings are the only practical way to establish the killer without ever leaving the brownstone. I do acknowledge how satisfactory it is to confound the gathered with a precise reasoned analysis”.

The Queen says:

“I do have an ulterior motive to this meeting.”

Poirot and Wolfe lean forward, their interest piqued.

The Queen carries on:

“Would you be willing to combine our talents to solve murder? The internet makes world communication instant. We have trusted sidekicks to handle details and technical matters. My contacts around the world are unparalleled. M. Poirot is a master of the subtle interview. Mr. Wolfe has the determination of the English bulldog. For progress meetings I can invite the two of you for a dine and sleep.  For the climax of cases M. Poirot and myself could fly to New York City to sit in on the meetings at which Mr. Wolfe unveils the killers.”

Poirot sprightly arises and announces:

“Ma’am, it would be the highlight of my life to unravel murder with you and Nero.”

Wolfe heaves himself to his feet and says:

“Nothing would make me happier than to join you, Ma’am, and Hercule in solving murders.”

The Queen gracefully rises and proclaims:

“Killers beware! The most formidable team of sleuths the world has ever seen is on the case!”

****

Bennett, S.J. - (2025) - Her Majesty Investigates - A Three Dog Problem; (2026) - The Windsor Knot

The Windsor Knot by S.J. Bennett

(8. - 1297.) The Windsor Knot by S.J. Bennett - Queen Elizabeth II loves Windsor Castle. It is her favourite residence. She enjoys a delightful evening of dining and dancing. The next day she is enjoying a morning ride when she learns the young Russian pianist, Maksim Brodsky, who performed Rachmaninoff so brilliantly the night before and swept her around the ballroom, has died. She pries out of her reluctant private secretary, Sir Simon Holcroft, that the young man was found nude, hanging in his room closet, with feminine underwear and lipstick around. She is told it is “by the look of it, accidental” - autoerotic asphyxiation.

Prince Philip bluntly sets out the image many have of the 89 year old Queen in 2016:

“.... All they see is a little old lady in a hat.”

She is much more than her image as demonstrated in the book. 

Sir Simon is soon back to tell the Queen that Brodsky’s death was neither accidental or suicide. The weight of his body is not upon the knot on the doorknob.

The Queen’s assistant private secretary, Rozie Oshodi, arrives back from her cousin’s wedding in Nigeria to the public and private drama of another murder in the Royal Household.

The Queen is patronized by the head of MI-5, Gavin Humphreys, “a managerial technocrat”, who takes it upon himself to explain to the Queen that she underestimates Vladimir Putin. Humphreys advises her that Maksim, an anti-Putin blogger, was assassinated at her residence to send a message that Putin can attack his enemies anywhere. Humphrey thinks there is a mole, a long time Russian spy, among her hundreds of staff.

The Queen ignores the condescension but doubts his pompous conclusions. She has met and measured Putin. Humphreys is unaware of:

…. an unspoken accord among the ruling classes, among whom he (Putin) was so proud to count himself these days: princes did not tread directly on the patch of other princes. One might spy, certainly, if one could. One might seek to undermine one’s enemies in negotiations or elections. But you did not commit lesè-majesté and cause havoc in their palaces. If you did - who knew? - perhaps one day they might do the same in yours. Even dictators understood this.

She further muses, why would Putin kill “a very junior enemy” with a prized sleeper asset?

She might have responded more forthrightly had she not had a spy, Anthony Blunt, one of the Cambridge Five, previously  in her employ and never realized he was a spy.

She subtly sets off on her own investigation by having Rozie arrange for the Queen to be invited to a quiet private tea at the home of her friend, Fiona, Lady Hepburn. It will be so private Sir Simon will not know she is meeting at the tea a British military expert “on suspicious deaths of Russians on British soil”. 

Rozie is the Boss’s (Queen’s) personal secret agent following a line of women who have carried out investigations for the Queen who is unprepared to let the men who are certain they know best do what they consider best.

Also at Windsor for the “dine and sleep” was Russian billionaire, Yuri Peyrovskaya, and his much younger gorgeous wife, Masha.

While she muses, the Queen thinks in the third person. How “one” was treated by the staff. What could “one” ask Rozie to do for her? Should “one” visit the room where Maksim died?

In her investigation the Queen is a woman after my heart. She constantly asks “one” why.

Why would a murder be done in a Royal residence where security is all around?

Why would someone commit murder knowing there would be an intense investigation by the best detectives in the realm?

Why was the murder rather amateurish?

The Queen recognizes the importance of awards. Beyond the titles she can bestow she has instituted “the Elizabeth Cross, awarded to the next of kin of members of the armed forces killed in action or in a terrorist attack”.

For a short time the Queen must focus on the celebrations for her 90th birthday. There are great and small gatherings. She is driven around in her queen-mobile (think of the popemobile). She wants just a little fuss which means a banquet for 70. She lights a beacon, the first in over 1,000 in the U.K. The British have a grand style for pageantry.

Amidst the glitter and pomp and circumstance the Queen, a woman of faith, takes time to talk to God. She sits alone in her private chapel praying to the Lord about family and those gone as I do at night.

I sometimes forget that for over 70 years the Queen met with generations of world leaders. Based on the book she had real conversations with them.

As her private agents report the Queen grows apprehensive that conspiracy may be afoot. Her agents remind me of Queen Elizabeth I who used agents and spies to protect herself and the realm.

The danger level rises dramatically as the Queen’s agents are noticed.

At a meeting to discuss the investigation reaching a resolution the Queen expresses her feelings to Humphreys on early mis-steps in the investigation with a quiet remark:

“How unfortunate.”

The title and cover design of The Windsor Knot are brilliant. They are striking and reflective of the Queen and the book’s plot.

Bennett continues to be very clever at showing how shrewd a sleuth is Queen Elizabeth. She is so subtle it is rare anyone realizes she is pulling strings in the background. I was most impressed at how she created a vital, involved, bright 90 year old woman solving complex mysteries.

****

Bennett, S.J. - (2025) - Her Majesty Investigates - A Three Dog Problem

King of Ashes by S.A. Cosby

(6. - 1295.) King of Ashes by S.A. Cosby - I was drawn to read King of Ashes for several reasons. I enjoyed Razorblade Tears and All the Sinners Bleed despite the ferocious violence. King of Ashes was on the New York Times hardcover bestseller list for several weeks last summer. Most important, on George Easters compilation of 89 lists of favourite crime fiction in 2025 in Deadly Pleasures Mystery Magazine it was on 32 lists. The next highest total was 27 lists for Richard Osman’s book The Impossible Fortune. I try not to read a book with high expectations lest I be disappointed by the book not reaching lofty expectations. King of Ashes came with such praise it was impossible not to anticipate a great book. 

From the opening pages Cosby drew me into the story. Roman Carruthers, Rome to some, is a very successful financial adviser at Carruthers & Associates in Atlanta. His savings are “nearly forty million dollars”. His clients are equally successful in the worlds of entertainment and business. Beautiful women enjoy time with him. 

At the same time he has a monthly appointment with Miss Delicate, a dominatrix, who serves his need to be punished. After being phoned that his father is in a coma and urged to come home, he goes to see Miss Delicate before heading to Virginia. It has been five years since his last visit home.

Cosby is a philosopher of pessimism. A former girlfriend of Roman talks about the universe:

“I used to be afraid the universe was evil. Now I almost wish it was. Because evil can be bargained with, evil has a purpose, no matter how horrible it may be. But what I’ve come to realize is the universe is indifferent, and that is so much more terrifying,” she had said.

His mother, Bonita, has been missing for 19 years.

Roman grew up in Jefferson Run, an industrial city which has endured decades of decay. Carruthers Cremation Services continues to do well.

His sister Neveah operates the crematory with their father, Keith. Their brother, Dante, is of little assistance.

Roman agrees to help his sister the next day as she has “six bodies that gotta go in the oven” but he “has no desire to be the King of Ashes”. 

Cosby has Michael Connelly’s talent for creating memorable descriptions of people through their work such as the Lincoln Lawyer. 

Cosby is equally adept at evocative phrases.

He is very skilled at writing violence.

When their mother vanished after an evening shift as a hospital tech the family lost their “guiding light”. They are all still haunted. Grieving cannot end with no explanation for her disappearance.

Speculaion still swirls around Jefferson Run about her disappearance.

Roman makes a painful mistake while addressing a business problem of Dante with Torrent and Tranquil Gilchrist, the leaders of the Black Baron Boys. He acts to address his error.

The family troubles lead to an ugly situation beyond my imagination. It made me reflect on what I would do in an impossible situation. Roman will need more than a dominatrix to punish himself for his actions.

Roman quickly fits back into the routine of the crematory. He offers to close up one day. Neveah reminds him to turn off the gas valves and leave the exhaust on. She repeats her father’s mantra that “he don’t want the flames to turn against him”. 

They grew up on their father’s maxims. Some are chillingly frank:

“A body is just the meat and bones. By the time they get to us, the person they used to be is long gone.”

As his stress level rises and rises, Rome craves some BDSM. He needs the pain.

Roman is a master of making money. He is not averse to investing beyond the rules and regulations of the Securities and Exchange Commission. He is ready to play upon the greed of the Black Baron Boys. They have a lot of cash coming in from their ventures.

Roman has negotiated with hard men and women but negotiations have a different level of intensity when the investors have guns and an eagerness to use them.

The BBB continually use fear to achieve their goals. Fear is a powerful but short term strategy.

Khalil says:

“Love may not endure, but fear fails when a man’s had enough.”

Roman meets Jealousy “Jae” Evers, a gorgeous assistant in the Mayor’s office. She is the half-sister of Torrent and Tranquil. Both Roman and Jae are bright and well educated. They understand each other on multiple levels.  It is an unusual relationship for a thriller. 

As Roman strives to solve the BBB problem, family relationships swirl. Roman does not want to hear about his parents’ relationship 19 years ago. How many people cannot accept the truth about parents?

As the end nears chaos builds and bodies fall. Roman tries to keep Neveah safe. Physically she is protected. The consequences of family secrets are immense.

The ending is bloody plausible though it left me saddened for other reasons.

Roman becomes a different man. His father’s favourite phrase sums up the book:

“Everything burns.”

****

Cosby, S.A. - (2022) - Razorblade Tears and Who is S.A. Cosby?; (2024) - All the Sinners Bleed

Key Witness by J.F. Freedman - Part II

My previous post started a review of Key Witness by J.F. Freedman. This post completes the review.

Wyatt Matthews readies himself to defend Marvin White against an indictment that he killed 7 women. The main witness against him is Dwayne Thompson who has made a career of snitching on fellow inmates.

Thompson has supplied lots of details allegedly from Marvin.

Unlike The Widow the search for the real killer will be before the trial.

At the same time might there be an alibi for Marvin?

Wyatt rightfully focuses on the facts. There will be no clever legal arguments to save Marvin.

Wyatt is in an awkward position. His lifestyle is so far from Marvin’s life as to make it a challenge to even talk to Marvin about Marvin’s life.

The methodical Wyatt goes to the murder scenes and re-enacts what happened in his mind. 

There is drama in Wyatt’s personal life as trial preparation continues. The emotions are visceral. Both Wyatt and Moira are flawed. 

Freedman does very well at creating credible surprises.

Wyatt is a relentless investigator. Maybe even a better investigator than lawyer.

428 pages had gone by before the trial starts in an unnamed American large city. I wish Freedman had chosen an actual city or at least a state. I like to visualize the real life city or state.

I was fine with the amount of pre-trial pages. Legal work before trial is intriguing. The trial took 200 pages.

Up to the trial I found it interesting that the prosecutor, Helena, has but a minute role in the book.

The prospective juror questioning, which rarely happens in Canada, had an initial question that defines the difference between a majority of American states and Canada. Jurors were asked if they had problems “handing down a death sentence if the findings in the trial warrant it”. In the book 25% of the potential jurors are disqualified by answering yes. In America, a jury of your peers in a death penalty case is not a jury reflecting the community.

The crime scene photos are shown at the start of the trial by the prosecutor. They are grisly showing not just killing wounds but also wounds that were mutiliation or torture.

The knife wounds and brutalization of the women were consistent through all seven women. They are described in enough detail that it was hard reading.

There are good reasons for prosecutors not trying 7 murders simultaneously that are attributed to one killer. There are bound to be variations from murder to murder. Too many differences risk an acquittal.

Wyatt does a good job of pinning down the prosecution witnesses on specific details. 

The trial was riveting. Freedman did well with the court process and testimony. I raced to finish the book.

As the trial is concluding Wyatt rationalizes some of his actions. In real life, your client has to be your concern as defence counsel. No conflicting loyalty can take priority over the accused. 

After finding out Freedman had been a screenwriter I realized the story was proceeding in episodes like a T.V. series. They are not defined as episodes butl it made reading easier as I could read it in chunks. His screenwriting background really came through in the ending.

As far as I can tell Freedman has never been a lawyer. His skill in depicting lawyers and court cases had me thinking he was a lawyer. At the end, in the acknowledgements, he thanked David A. Freedman, J.D. for his “great assistance in helping me with all the legal aspects” of the book.

It was interesting to read about a lawyer who could spend months preparing for a single trial. In real life I doubt any lawyer in private practice or legal aid or government or prosecutions would be able to solely concentrate on one case.

I enjoyed Freedman’s book but I rarely want to read 629 pages. 

While published 29 years ago in 1997 I found the story stood up well a generation later. 

****

Freedman, J.F. - (2026) - Key Witness - Part I

Key Witness by J.F. Freedman - Part I

(5.) 1294.) Key Witness by J.F. Freedman (1997) - A swirl of plotlines are led by big law mega lawyer, Wyatt Matthews. He is burned out after years litigating huge corporate cases. From the latest he will receive a $3,000,000 bonus. Wyatt is ready to resign from the 168 lawyer firm for which he is the primary rainmaker. The firm funds two of its lawyers every year for  pro bono positions with Legal Aid. When, at a senior partners meeting, one of the positions is announced as open he offers to take it. The 17 other senior partners, desperately not wanting to have him resign, rush to let him go practice criminal law for 6 months. He will work with the poor and poorer. Most will have committed the offences for which they are charged. He is eager to practice on the “right side of the street” for a while. His wife, Moira, thinks he is crazy.

As Wyatt transitions from his huge corner office to a Legal Aid cubicle half the size of his former private bathroom, a serial killer strikes again. The “Alley Slasher” has moved from killing prostitutes to murdering a young factory working woman.

Within the jail system Dwayne Thompson, a manipulative computer genius and mean criminal, is in the city to testify against another inmate to get his current jail term reduced. He has made a career of crime and being a snitch. It is a wonder he is still alive.

Marvin White is 18 with a stereotypical future for a young inner city Black man before him. He has just been fired from his delivery job for stealing from his employer. His mother, Jonnie Rae, fed up with his behaviour, has kicked him out of her home. He has no skills or training. He quit school. He is functionally illiterate.

Marvin tries to rob a Korean convenience store. He botches the robbery and gets a load of buckshot in his ass.

Wyatt skilfully defends Marvin but Marvin has a big mouth. He talks in jail, while awaiting trial, about what he knows about the serial murders. Dwayne, who has an almost photographic memory, is an avid listener and assembles the information into a supposed confession by Marvin that he is the Alley Slasher.

Marvin is charged with the 7 murders and Wyatt will defend him.

Josephine DiStefano, a talented Legal Aid paralegal, is Wyatt’s sole assistant.

Moira hates Wyatt representing Marvin. She moves into the spare bedroom.

Dexter Gordon, Marvin’s best friend, is ready to help. A very successful drug dealer at 18 he has connections, including the police, throughout Marvin’s part of town and lots of money. 

Freedman does a good job of setting out the detailed questioning by Wyatt of a new client in a major case. The approach adds to the length of the book but it is real in the time and sometimes intrusive questioning needed. Marvin’s memory is far from photographic.

Helena Abramowitz, young and attractive and aggressive, is lead prosecutor. Alex Pagano, the DA aspiring to higher office, makes appearances when the media circus is largest.

Judge William T. Grant, the senior judge in the city, has his own aspirations for higher judicial positions. He is “conservative, a stern jurist” with expectations the lawyers before him will know the law.

Both Helena and Wyatt watch Dwayne testify. He had met Marvin while waiting in jail to give evidence in another case where he is a jailhouse informant. He is the perfect witness. He is candid, precise and consistent. Lawyers are uncomfortable with perfect witnesses. If they are perceived as speaking a script a case is in grave jeopardy.

Wyatt has the personal resources and determination to dig into Dwayne’s history as he prepares to cross-examine Dwayne. It is doubtful any of the defending counsel in Dwayne’s earlier snitch cases made such inquiries.

Can Wyatt find a way to impeach Dwayne? 

An early trial date is set.

(My next post completes pre-trial preparation and discusses the trial.)